the pretty lines told me to do it

Let’s discuss that damn graph CNN featured during the Palin/Biden debate.

This empty visual commanded the bottom quarter of the screen (see attached image). To the left, a nifty inform-a-box announced that the ensuing lines—which rose/fell along an axis throughout the debate—represented the opinions of “Undecided Ohio Voters.” Uh. Dare I ask: how many undecided voters? Twelve? 400,000? CNN omitted that minor detail. Silly me, I really oughta keep my mouth shut. They probably know what they’re doing.

Two bipolar lines (green for "men," yellow for "women") leapt about in fits of shocking whimsy. Swell! Let’s genderize the hell outta this thing! Thanks, CNN, for simplifying this terribly confusing debate. My frail little brain wouldn’t know what to make of all this discussion nonsense otherwise. While you’re at it, why not add a few more lines? “Black,” “white,” “bigots,” “humanitarians,” “southerners,” “northerners,” “believers,” “non-believers,” etc. Or howz about we just throw the most liberal person in America and the most conservative in a room and arm each of them with a buzzer? Fastest finger wins!

The Palin/Biden debate was not about graphs. I should have spent more time listening to the WORDS being uttered by the potential LEADERS of our floundering COUNTRY, but the pretty graph monopolized my attentions.

I couldn't believe what I was seeing.

The graph meant nothing. Absolutely nothing. That little green line—the “men”—shot up when Biden uttered something or other about issue x. Right on, "men." Now, what does this fluorescent protuberance mean? Are these 12 or 400,000 voters agreeing with him on issue x, or did Biden’s wayward commentary serve to draw them ever closer to what’s-her-face, their original leaning? The two axes were never defined. I have no idea

1) who’s manipulating the lines
2) what the lines represent

On the plus side, it took the thinking out of it for tens of thousands of toothless Americans. Shoot, Myrtle, look at that line! It spiked way the hell up there when he said that last part about the health care and whatnot! I think Biden’s on to something…

CNN, you suck.
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